and life goes on...

it's officially been two weeks since I was in the beautiful country of Costa Rica. 

Wow. 

I would love to say that every minute of every day, I was waiting, wishing, and hoping to be back at that place with those people, giving and helping. And for the most part I do! I miss it more than anyone would believe. It just felt right. It was the only thing in my life recently that has been satisfying and had a meaning greater than myself--greater than all of us. However, as soon as I landed back in the good ole U.S. of A. life was waiting on me. My life. My busy, crazy, college senior life. 

No one and nothing here had been effected by Costa Rica. None had experienced it's love and affection or seen its beauty. Hearts weren't touched the same way. Pictures didn't do justice to what soul changing had taken place because their souls weren't present and didn't take part in the great adventure. 

Life in Birmingham, Al and Nashville, TN hadn't stopped while I'd been gone. 

Shocker, right? 

It was all waiting for me to get off the plane. My MCAT study books laid out on my floor. My med school applications waiting to be typed up. Family graduation invitations waiting on the counter with dates fast approaching. Phone with voicemails, texts, and facebook messages saying "YOU'RE BACK! We need to catch up! I want to hear about your trip! I have so much to tell you!"

We're all waiting to welcome me back. some of them much more appealing than the others :)  but nonetheless still a little overwhelming to come into especially when my priorities had been so different only hours before. 

how quickly things change. 

Now it's been two weeks. Two weeks of life and catching up and getting back into the swing of things. And I think I'm almost back into the full swing and absolute chaos that is my everyday life. I haven't cried in a while- so that's good right? I actually would prefer to be a little sad; it would mean that my daily life was more impacted by my time there. It would mean that I was changed. Instead, it seems that I still go about shopping, dining out, watching TV, blogging, etc with no thoughts about it all. It seems.

I really do think about it constantly, although not as much anymore. My memory has grown fuzzy- what was the name of that patient? Which community was that again? Oh yeahh, Ernesto of Los Diques. It's a stretch. It's like a dream almost. Like, "I really did that?! I went to another country for 2 weeks? With strangers? REALLY? ME?" The memories are good ones when they come, but unlike the days that I was bawling in my bed they are fleeting thoughts and glimpses of a time in my life.

Although all I wanted to do when I got home was immediately drop all thoughts of graduate school and move to Costa Rica to live and work with those communities, my best friend (and family) quickly snapped me out of that idea. They all know my heart (I'm really blessed by them in that way), and they know I just want to help and serve people to the best of my ability. That ability, however, does not stop with undergraduate. It does not stop with this path in my life. I don't know where it stops, but these memories/glimpses/dreams all will go with me and drive me to my destination, where ever it may be. I'm still waiting on God for that one. He's going to direct this show, I'm perfectly ok with letting Him drive. :)

So, life goes on. It's sad to leave things behind, happy to encounter new things, and even scarier to reach unknown things. But no matter what, the things we go through make us who we are supposed to be, who we are meant to be.