4th of July

best friends are people you trust with your heart, your life, and your secrets. they love you despite your faults and laugh with you, not at you. when you hate the world, they do too, they've got your back no matter what and support you/push you toward your dreams. you may fight or disagree but at the end of the day, you're sisters. there through it all.

this weekend i get to see a few of my best friends from school and home that i haven't seen in a while. i'm too excited for words!

God is good.

"All Alone! Whether you like it or not. Alone will be something you'll be quite a lot. And when you're alone, there's a very good chance you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare so much you won't want to go on." - Dr. Seuss

So, i know its a little lame. But it's Dr. Seuss, he's like the next thing to Shakespeare! haha but this is how i'm feeling and this is what i needed tonight. I needed reassurance that being alone is normal, its something we need! In order for me to be a sane person, I have to be alone for a good amount of time. Its part of life, a season if you will.

Considering this, i am taking a "me" night. well more like a me 18 hours. from now until about 4 tomorrow i will be taking a sabbatical form technology, from worries, from life. I will be reading, reminiscing in some Grey's Anatomy, and spending time with the Lord. I need to regroup, and ground myself in Him.

Sweet summer, you are brutal sometimes.

memories, sweet memories

I haven't blogged in a while, Where did June GO?!?! I cannot believe that summer is halfway over and at the same time I cannot wait for it to be fall again. Time is going by so quickly. Is there some way that I can slow it down? Please?

I was reminded at how fast time goes by this weekend at my grandparent's house. Oh how I love and miss those two people. Who knew that two individuals could create such chasms in my heart? Can one love that much as to be permanently broken by their loss? Oh how i love them. They were my rocks, my supporters. What I would give to hug them one more time or for them to get to see me now. There is one hope that I have though in this solitude, I will see them in Heaven one day. They will be the ones to greet me when I get there. That makes me so happy :)

I wish I could talk to them. I want them to give me advice that only they could give. I want them to guide me towards the Lord because thats what they did, they always pointed my upward.

Ah, well, in all of this the Lord is bringing me to Him. I realize that I need Him so much more than I know. He loves me even when I don't recognize Him. (Psalm 73:22) He is here with me even at my worst moments, even when I don't feel like anyone is on my side. He provides for me- a family, friends that love me, opportunities to reach my goals/dreams. And ultimately, He created me, so He understands me far better than anyone here on earth could ever understand me. Lord, Thank you so much for being the ultimate Father. I love you. give Gran & Papaw a hug for me.

Summer time

I don't really have anything to blog about. Seeing as how my life as been seemingly uneventful in the last few weeks. I did go to the lake with some wonderful friends a few weeks ago and will be going to see some more friends tomorrow, which I am extremely happy about! Lets start this post off with the statement that I believe that this summer has been one of my top 5 summers of all time, and its only a third of the way done! Can this be real?

I am content. For one of the first times in a long time, I am content. You see, this past year has been one of extreme discontentment for unknown reasons. Please don't get me wrong. I have absolutely loved every minute of my year, but they're not kidding when they call it the sophomore slump! It was super rough on all levels. Coming home was, well, it was like coming to a safe haven. A place where nothing bad could happen, all my cares behind me, no stress, no worries, and it's turned out to be true. Home. A typical college student takes fore-granted the pleasures of home, I know I did. We just think that now that we live 24/7 with our friends, with new freedoms that we are entitled to it and that we know what's best for us. WRONG. We're adults- Yes. Are we necessarily smart adults?- (most college students- No). We still need our moms sometimes, we still need home cooked meals and clean sheets (because come on do you really wash that often??). Most of all what I've learned is that growing up means you know when you need time alone.

The Bible says that Christ separated himself from the disciples so that he could pray. If Christ had to be alone, do we think so highly of our 20-something-selves that we don't need to be alone? That's foolish! This summer I am (have and will) working on this fact.

Alone. It's a scary word. It carries so much weight with it, so much dread and fear. Every time I hear that word I sort of involuntarily cringe. No one likes to be alone all of the time. Whether its being with a family member, friend, or significant other no one likes to be alone. We all want someone. Well, I've been thinking... And are we every truly alone? If God is everywhere can we every be alone? God says that He carries us when we cannot handle the weight of this world, He takes our burdens, He holds our hand. How amazing is this? Its a fact that is awe-inspiring as well as one that is hard to put into practice. So I'm content. I'm content with spending the summer with God and the people he has blessed me with. That sounds pretty amazing to me.