is it really already Wednesday? seriously? where did this week go?

well, last week was simply insane. thats the only real word i can use for it that does any justice to what i was feeling, which was OVERWHELMED. this week has been 1000 times better and less stressful but not completely stress free.

I went on a retreat last weekend, where i spent several hours alone in the solitude of Christ. It was magical. I honestly thought that i would hate it because i do NOT like being alone. but I had the opportunity to organize my mind and allow God to take my troubles away from me.

I learned that if i give everything over to God and I mean EVERYTHING then i feel better. Not only better, but I can trust and rest in the fact that HE has a magnificent plan :)

Psalm 46:10 "Be still and know that I am God."

Sinking....

I'm incredibly overwhelmed these days.

I've never felt so stressed, over worked, under appreciated, or sleep deprived.

Its insane.

I know God will carry me through, but its just so hard to trust. I have problems right here and right now, that I want an immediate answer to. I know I have to trust Him because that's the only place that I'll find rest and peace. So here's my prayer-- God of the Universe, Creator, Savior, Father, Friend, please deliver me through this time of trouble. As it says in Isaiah 43, You will not let me be burned by the fire and the waters will not overwhelm me when i'm with You. Guide me through these next few days, as I know you will, but just take over for me. I can NOT do it. I am a weak human and cannot do anything of my own accord. You created the universe, no organic chemistry test or genetics exam will phase you. You know all things. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Its you in me, God. Thank you so much for Your unending love and mercy. I love you Lord. You are my stronghold in times of trouble. No other can calm me like you. You are my Father. Amen.

Stress of this world will always be present but God will take your burdens if only you let him. Psalm 55:22- Cast your burdens on the Lord and he will sustain you.

treausre

coming back to nashville this weekend i was thinking and listening to music, just kind of reveling in the beauty of the drive. its such a magnificent drive with all of the hills and trees.

anyways, i was driving and listening to some music, some christian and some not. while i was listening, i heard some lyrics that i dont even remember what song they came from, but it was talking about how WE are God's treasure. it took a little while for that to sink in. You mean to say, that I am His treasure?!?!?! ME--a dirty, rotten sinner, not worthy of God's gaze much less His love. Its a concept not too foreign for me, I mean I've been in sunday school and church where they briefly mention God's love for us through saying that God sent His Son to die for us so that we are saved. Such a beautiful picture of sacrificial love, yet it gets overlooked because of its common use. When thinking about being God's treasure, i started to wonder- WHY? why does He want me? Im no where good enough. I mess up every day. I fall short every minute. But then, the sunday school teaching kicked in. When Christ died on the cross for our sins, His blood covered every past sin, every present sin, and every new sin. When God looks in His book, He will not be able to see that on September 7, 2010 I screwed up 11000 times. He'll only see His absolutely perfect and blameless Son because I've accepted the invitation to follow Christ. This does NOT give me a get out of jail free card by any means. I still have to ask for forgiveness and I try my best to lead a righteous life worthy of Christ, but before I even get out of bed I know that it is not possible. I CAN however, accept that God in His infinite love for me and for His Son, WILL forgive me. His mercy is never ending. His love is never failing. His GRACE is everlasting. And that is why on my ride home yesterday I fell in love with my Savior all over again. He's my Father, my Redeemer, my Joy, and my Peace.

We find Peace when we rest in God alone.